All that's wrong with today's media Thursday, January 27, 2011

So the income tax people raid Priyanka chopra's home and find Shahid kapoor in his boxers. So what? I mean I'm really sad to see today's standards of journalism falling to such low levels. Here is an issue of national theft and look how unimaginative the news stories are! To make matters worse, here's a pic the stupid channels put up, supposedly shot moments after the IT people entered her home, when Shahid kapoor was trying to flee all the media:

Yep. I know what you're thinking. The guy's still obsessed with his last hit. But then, there was something wrong in these news reports. I put my investigating shorts on, and delved deep like I always do. On clearly examining the pic, you can see one big problem. No, its not that he's wearing that horse thingy on his face, Shahid kapoor has already been seen in public wearing that weird shit. The huge problem with the pic is that he's wearing denims, as opposed to the much reported cheetah print boxer shorts. Clearly the media is, as usual, trying to rip us off with a lie!

But then, what they don't realize is the fact that yours truly is the epitome of active citizen journalism. I went through some serious shit to get hold of this super classified photograph which was the actual pic clicked then the Income tax people raided Priyanka chopra's home.

Well, what can I say... that lucky bastard! Oh and also, Priyanka chopra.......... RESPECT!

I dream of a day... Saturday, January 22, 2011

I dream of a day, when Indian men would become so procreative, that the entire world would be brown.

I dream of a day, when Indian women would look at 35, exactly the way they did at 30.

I dream of a day, when boys in school would become enlightened enough to know that the supposed 'hotties' in school end up looking weird by the time they are 24, and the ones who they ignored, turn out to be real stunners.

I dream of a day, when salaries would be distributed with the figure announced on a loud speaker.

I dream of a day, when neck massages in office would not amount to sexual harrasment.

I dream of a day, when Shekhar Suman would realize he's not 24.

I dream of a day, when Rakhi Sawant would be happily married to Rahul Mahajan, which would mean two less douche-bags to bear on TV.

I dream of a day, when Manmohan singh would have had enough of all the yelling in parliament and finally shout at the opposition "Chup karo oye BHEN DE #@$%&##..!!!"

I dream of a day, when Sonia Gandhi would read out the 'maha mrityunjay mantra' with such perfect diction, that after thousand of years the out-of-work devtas above would throw rose petals just like they did in those old serials.

I dream of a day, when around the age of 20, all that women would think of would be sex, and all that men would think of would be finding their true love, and discounted chappals... their preference not exactly in that order.

I dream of a day, when men would cry watching 'Aisha', and make notes of Abhay Deol's costumes in the movie

I dream of a day, when Mithun would say in public, that Mimoh is not really his child.

I dream of a day, when Shahrukh khan and Karan Johar would romance each other on screen.

I dream of a day, when Sunil shetty would get completely cured of the paralysis attack which hit his face in his youth.

I dream of a day when Raj Kundra would wake up once before Shilpa shetty does, and after having a long look at her sans make up face, realize how fucking ugly she is!

I dream of a day, when parents aren't afraid of sending their daughters to study engineering.

I dream of a day, when that guy from 'Sansani' exposes his own MMS scam on TV.

I dream of a day, when outsourcing makes way for out-outsourcing, which means that US gives work to India, and we pass it on to Nepal/Bangladesh, and earn money while doing nothing.

I dream of a day, when my blog post says 'I told you so HA!', the year says 2020 and the hyperlink in that post brings you here.

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